Oh Hey Guys, I'm Coming to Visit!, America!, We Did It! Phillies!, Chase Utley!

Dear Nephews,

It is I, your Uncle. I'm writing you this morning to inform you that I shall be traveling a great distance, across flowing rivers, over rocky mountains, and past the relatively travel-friendly valleys of this glorious nation of ours to where it all began, the great city of Philadelphia, to celebrate America's 237th birthday. (Philadelphia, which as we all know is Quaker for "Phil's Place") And on this special day of days I request your presence for various food eatings and meat grillings and drink drinkings and what have yous.

You may be saying to yourselves, "Hey, awesome Uncle Kevin is coming to visit, I love that guy, he's the best and I hope to be just like him when I grow up, but what's the big deal about the 4th of July anyway?" Well, if you'll recall I told you all about it last year! Brayden, you get a free pass for not being born and all, but I expected more from the Murray Brothers. A lot more. (-_-)

So no history lessons today, though you should be aware that today marks the 150th anniversary of the Battle of Gettysburg, which was a turning point in the American Civil War. It was the largest battle of the war and many say if the South had won the 3 day battle, we'd be eating chitlins in Philadelphia instead of cheesesteaks. You'll go there on a field trip one day and you'll see some old muddy cabins with old wooden pipes inside and long eery fields that make you feel like you traveled back in time to a sad place where scared men did brave things to change the world forever. Or you'll get the high score on some game on your phone and accidentally fart in front of girl you like. Field trips are a mystery, boys, you never know what will happen.

So a little history lesson today. It's America's Birthday! Cahm ahn! And it's important that we talk about our history. If not to be inspired by our triumphs or learn from our mistakes, then to have a distinct advantage over those who choose to ignore either. Remember I said that, might be the only smart thing I ever teach you. Also, calculus is dumb, you don't need to learn it.

I just wanted to say hey guys, I'm coming to visit!, America!, We Did It!, Phillies!, Chase Utley!, and I'm looking forward to meeting you, Brayden. I'll be asking some questions to make sure the Murray Brothers have been treating you well, showing you the ropes. We're gonna have a good time this weekend and we'll celebrate America's birthday with bar-b-que and fireworks and watching the Phillies trounce the Braves (A whole 'nother war entirely). It's gonna be great.

Your Favorite Uncle,

Kevin